


a flower that can't be bloomed in a dream that can't come true

by letowrites



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Hurt No Comfort, I forgot how hard tagging was ahh please let me know if I missed anything !!, M/M, Requited Love, just not enough :(
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-18 09:50:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21509125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letowrites/pseuds/letowrites
Summary: Yeosang knew. He knew that Yunho loved him, just like Yunho knew that Yeosang’s heart was his.Maybe they’d waited too long. Maybe they weren’t meant for each otherenough.
Relationships: Jeong Yunho/Kang Yeosang
Comments: 5
Kudos: 26





	a flower that can't be bloomed in a dream that can't come true

**Author's Note:**

> to my 6 subscribers who r most likely from the hq fandom... I'm sorry that this wasn't the update to my last fic that u were hoping for
> 
> ahh hi !! this is very exciting for me because I haven't been able to finish a fic since I was in the haikyuu!! fandom and I got this done in one day :( that's crazy I'm so happy!! I don't think it's rlly my best writing, but I was just happy to finally get something done that I don't care anymore ahh, pls enjoy. 
> 
> not beta read bc we die like men (and also bc I was too excited and just wanted to post this already)

“It’s okay,” Yeosang assures him, hands placing themselves gently on both sides of Yunho’s face.

It’s not. It’s not okay and Yunho knows it. If it was okay then there wouldn’t be tear tracks on Yeosang’s face. There wouldn’t be a river in Yeosang’s eyes, desperately trying to hold back from bursting out. 

_I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sor--_ “I’m sorry,” Yunho says, succumbing to his emotions and letting the sobs escape his mouth.

“Don’t apologize. I know,” Yeosang says, thumb wiping away the tears that flow down Yunho’s cheeks. He gives Yunho a shaky smile. The last thing Yeosang wants to do is break down in front of the boy he loves, the boy he can’t have. Yeosang knew, just like he told Yunho. He knew that whatever it had been between them wouldn’t last. How could it? How could it last when Yunho had _him_ , the boy who danced among the stars and shone brighter than Yeosang could ever hope to?

Yeosang knew. He knew that Yunho loved him, just like Yunho knew that Yeosang’s heart was his. Maybe they’d waited too long. Maybe they weren’t meant for each other _enough._

Yunho always thought that the boy in front of him would be his forever. From the moment he tripped and fell straight on his face trying to run to the playground swings. Yunho had rushed over to help him and gotten a faceful of seven year old Yeosang in his shirt, refusing to let himself do anything more than sniffle at the pain. Yunho thought he was adorable, trying so hard not to cry from what could only have been a cut on his nose. He’d felt a surge of protectiveness over the boy back then and made a promise that for as long as they staged by each other’s side, Yunho would make sure Yeosang never felt pain like that again.

Except. Except he’d obviously failed, if the heartbroken boy in front of him was anything to go by. Seven year old Yunho would hate the Yunho now, the Yunho that not only broke his promise, but was the _cause_ of that pain.

Yunho didn’t know when his thoughts stopped being so overwhelmingly Yeosang, Yeosang, _Yeosang_. He didn’t know when striking eyes and beautiful galaxies painting the side of Yeosang’s face were replaced by softer, smaller eyes. Ones that would turn into crescent moons when Yunho made him laugh. He didn’t know when precious, reserved smiles -- smiles that only Yunho was allowed to see -- were replaced by blinding, infectious grins. He didn’t know when Yeosang stopped being the only one in his heart. 

“I’m sorry,” Yunho repeats. “I love you, you know that? I do,” he asks desperately. Yeosang had to know, he had to know that Yunho loved him, that he never stopped.

“I know.” Yeosang repeats, this time with a softer smile on his face. It was blinding. Yunho just wished it actually reached his eyes. “I love you too.” 

Yunho’s heart shatters even more; Yeosang’s confession sounds too much like a goodbye. 

“I love you too.. And that’s why.. That’s why I have to let you go, right?” Yeosang swallows, almost like he was trying to convince himself. He tries to keep his voice steady, for Yunho. 

Yeosang draws his hands back to his sides and away from Yunho even as the other boy reaches out to keep them there. Yeosang doesn’t think he can, not if he wants to get this next part out. “You’ve made me so happy, Yunnie. Ever since that day on the playground when you became my knight in shining armour. I… I can’t remember a time I was happy that wasn’t in some way because of you, Yunnie. You gave me so many of my firsts.”

“My first friend. The first butterflies in my stomach. My first adventure, first kiss…” Yeosang drew in a deep breath. He brought one of his hands back to Yunho and lightly traces the side of his face, from his eyes down to his jaw, almost like he was too scared to touch. “My first love.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t make you as happy as you’ve made me,” and Yunho parts his lips, ready to scream, to cry out that no, _no, of course_ Yeosang made him happy, that Yunho didn’t know what true happiness was until he met Yeosang, but nothing would come out. The words were caught in his throat. “But it’s okay. I’m glad there’s someone who did, who can.”

“All I want is to see you happy, so it’s okay that it isn’t with me, Yunnie. It is.” Was it? Yeosang couldn’t even believe himself with how hard the tears were streaming down his face. 

Yeosang didn’t think he could stay there any longer. If he stays here with Yunho, he might do something stupid, like beg for Yunho to choose him, but he couldn’t. Yeosang knew that Yunho’s heart had already made its choice, even if his tearstained, reddened face didn’t make it seem so. 

So, Yeosang did what he had to do. He took one last breath in, something to give him that last push. He didn’t want to give Yunho a chance to speak. Yeosang didn’t know what he’d do if he let himself listen to what the other wants to say.

Yeosang rose slightly on his tip toes and leans in to give Yunho a kiss on the cheek. 

“Thank you, Yunho.” 

Yeosang stays for a moment near Yunho after he pulls back, just to breathe in his presence, his warmth. Yeosang looks up at Yunho one last time and gives him a sad smile before he turns around, slowly, and walks away. 

A small, bitter laugh escapes Yeosang as he leaves the boy he loves alone, on the same playground they met on all those years ago. Everyone called them childhood sweethearts. It was rare to see one of the two without the other by his side. It was always Yeosang and Yunho. Never Yeosang. And. Yunho. 

Yeosang could see why they called them childhood sweethearts, but they were never _really_ sweethearts.

Almost, 

_Not yet. Soon, maybe._

but not quite.

**Author's Note:**

> I tried my best to make sure it didn't sound like yunho cheated (he didn't btw) but idk how well that came across :( also hehe take a guess at who the other guy yunho fell in love with is !!
> 
> my twitter is @litaegi if u want to talk to me !!! or scream at me hehe
> 
> I do accept constructive criticism! just pls be nice about it, and comments/kudos are very appreciated :)


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